I Wish, Wish, Wish I Looked Like Kate Bosworth

Well, my friend Chris sent me a morph video that he’d done on this web site, and being a sucker for such things, I couldn’t resist. So, I uploaded a picture of myself to their “celebrity lookalike” thing. Admittedly, I used my recent PopTech glam shot taken by my friend Asa Mathat, who’s clearly very experienced at making ordinary folks look good.

Now, I was prepared for the obvious - Garth Brooks, for example. But what I was definitely not ready for was…

…Kate Bosworth. Gulp… Kate Bosworth? Now kids, I loove Kate Bosworth.

But if I really looked like Kate Bosworth, even a little tiny bit, there’d be precious little reason to leave the house.

I mean, I’d just stay home all day and play dress-up.

Looking longingly and seductively into the mirror every two seconds, I’d prance to and fro, singing little love songs, flirting with myself gaily and, ever-so-slowly, building up to making wild, rough steamy love to myself every hour or so, as conditions allowed. And, dear friends, things would get broken.

Oh yes - yes, they would.